August 24, 2010

D Day

Tomorrow is the big day. 7:30am to be exact. I will no longer be pregnant and I will have a cute little nugget to love on.
Also, my body will be back to this.....

No I am kidding. It will take at least 2 weeks to look like that again. Ok I am kidding again. Whatever.

August 19, 2010

Wrong On Every Level

Is it just me, or are these maternity photos creeeeeepy?!?!

Hockey Mom?!?! p.s. your bra isn't hiding much.

Naked ones just scare me. Big time. Who spoons standing up anyway?

I have no words for this one. Really? A tire? What, did she go into the tire shop for a repair and end up taking this gem of a man home? Lucky girl.

August 12, 2010

Pregnant For Life

Remember the movie, "The Sandlot?' Remember the kid on there that says, "Forever" in a weird crazy voice? That's how I feel. Like I am going to be pregnant forever. I am 36 weeks right now. I am sick. I have issues. My body hates being pregnant and the funny thing is, so do I. I had an amniocentesis done to see if Little Girls lungs are developed and of course, they aren't. So what does that mean? 6 more weeks of winter of course. The doctors want to deliver her just as bad as I want her to be delivered. But if Little Girl isn't ready, we must not rush her. And so we wait. Some more.

August 3, 2010

The Only Stupid Question Is The One Not Asked...

Unless you're asking a pregnant woman something. Then there is a 99% chance that it's a stupid question. Seriously. People ask pregnant women STUPID questions. And since I am on bed rest and bored, I feel like ranting about this.
1. Aren't you hot in this weather?
No, I actually love being 45lbs over weight in 113 degree weather, it's refreshing.
2. Does it suck to be so swollen?
Again, no. I love misspelling every word in a text because my fingers are too fat to hit the right keys .
3. Are you so ready to have that baby?
Not at all. I feel like I could go another 9 months.
4. Do you crave and eat cookies all the time?
Ok I really do, but that's besides the point. Who asks this to someone? And who cares if I do!! Are you worried about there being a cookie shortage?
5. Aren't you so excited you're finally having a girl?
Finally? I am on baby #2, not 12. I have one boy, not 17.
6. When are you due? You look like you're about to pop right now!
4 weeks and so do you.
7. Should we stick a fork in you and see if you're done?
Should we hold a mirror to your face to see if it breaks?
Ahhhh since this is my last pregnancy, I really will miss hearing these amazing questions. But because this is my second pregnancy, I am learning to laugh when people ask me these things. I even give them sarcastic answers. Most people laugh back at me and realize the stupidity of their question, but some look shocked that I am laughing at them. How come the minute you're pregnant, your privacy goes out the door? Or strangers want to get all mushy and tell you how amazing child birth is and how awesome it is to have a little girl. Puke. Most people that know me, know I hate talking to strangers or random people and know that I really hate when people want to be all mushy with me about having a baby.
**Ok, so after proof reading this, maybe it is a good thing that I am stuck in my house, away from the public. Clearly it's not safe for me to be out with the general population.**